Honest Feedback
O.K. So you’re reading a fic, and all the sudden you start to wonder.... “What the heck is this?” Come on. You know you’ve thought it. You’ve just been too afraid to say it. So instead you tell the author how much you love the story, even though you’re swearing under your breath that you will never read another one of their stories. Or even make it past the first paragraph of this one. So this page is dedicated to all the people who have ever read a fic that...well.... that stunk. The following lines are what would be seen in some emails if everyone could say what they're really thinking. Please, feel free to borrow them if a fic necessitates.
For all writers out there, please don't get paranoid over this. These were not written about any story in particular, we're just trying to have fun in our own TrifectaLy way. We truly appreciate any effort put into fiction and realize that you are putting yourself out there when you write. If it offends you, please feel free to send us some Honest Feedback.
* Whoever told you that you were a good writer is obviously better at writing fiction than you are.
* You write so bad, even your momma is ashamed to know you.
* The last time I read a fic that bad... nah, I’ve never read anything as bad as this.
* You do a great job of getting readers to empathize with the characters. I was feeling sorry for them the whole time that they had to be associated with this story.
* I’ve got one word for you. SPELLCHECK.
* I’m no grammar teacher, but I’m sure YOU’RE going to love this review of YOUR story. You know, the one YOU’RE currently in the midst of writing. But then again YOUR story could use a little revamping. I hope YOU’RE considering this.
* I really love your writing style you know the way you make everything so descriptive and keep talking and talking and continue so that I swear you have the longest sentences of any fic I’ve ever read and I tell you I’ve read a lot so that’s quite an accomplishment but I just wanted you to know what a high honor you have in my sight so keep that in mind as you finish this story..
* Are you sure this is fiction? Cause the boringness of it greatly resembles your own life.
* Check your pulse. I think the lifelessness in your writing is rubbing off on you.
* Well, we ran your story through the internet intelligence monitor and found that if you keep writing like this, you’ll be ready for first grade in no time.
* You writer. Me reader. You write bad stuff. [I’m trying to talk at your level. I apologize (that means I’m sorry) if this is over your head]
* The last time I checked, the English language did require verbs. Verbs are our friends. Use them.
* If I had a dime for every time I laughed at your story, I still couldn’t afford anything at the dime store.
* Have you ever wondered if people like your stories? Well, let me clear that up for you. No.
* Great story. Absolutely loved it. Can’t wait till you write more. (See, I can write fiction too.)
* I was reading some of the bad reviews posted about your fic, and they hardly do you justice. You’re a much worse writer than they give you credit for.
* I made a list of the top 5 worst fanfic writers, and after putting your name in the first 5 slots, I didn’t have room for anyone else.